Art by Liam Souren Turner
No 21 Change
We always go through changes, but we can not see them. Change and growth are part of life. Dealing with the pros and cons of change is a challenge. I start this article with these words, “Let’s get used to not getting used to.”
Our bodies and spirits are complementary. When we are born, we are all equal. Later, we are affected by our different cultures.
Growing up, we form our habits. As adults, many of us change our habits and beliefs in different ways. That is when the differences between the generations become apparent. Generation gaps have been problems for centuries. We can deal with the younger generations in a better way once we become aware of our own habits and backgrounds. We can have inner peace by self-awareness.
Our inner needs, desires, and talents grow and change. If we ignore them, then we will feel the inner disturbance and dissatisfaction of life. To have inner peace, it is essential to be aware that we go through changes. We don’t have the same needs and desires throughout our lives.
Sometimes, we have to change our home, city, or country due to circumstances. Any kind of change, good or bad, is a crisis and creates some level of stress.
We can accept our new home or country as a unique experience. Then we can enjoy the change. We can keep the good parts of our culture and traditions and adjust to our new culture. That’s when we can look at each day as a new beginning with its own characteristics. Then, we can see a sweet and fulfilling life.
December 6, 1987
No. 22 Feeling Homesick
In this article, I want to talk about homesickness. This is a word that we have used in our culture throughout the centuries, in our poetry and literature.
We have two inner forces, positive and negative. These two forces are in the struggle with each other. Most of our opposing forces are due to our cultural background and not knowing how to control our negative thoughts. These negative thoughts create anxiety and restlessness. With self-awareness and self-help, we can use positive thinking and empower happy emotions. We can feel satisfaction and happiness.
A change of location can cause a crisis and create stress. When we move to a new location, the negative feelings use this opportunity to come to the surface. The word homesick has a negative connotation of sick. Allowing this kind of negative vocabulary in our thoughts creates distress. When we become aware of this fact, then we can be in control.
We can think that we had to move or be dislocated due to life’s circumstances. Instead of fighting it and complaining, we can accept it and look at each day as a new beginning.
We can remember our good memories from the past and keep the good parts of our culture. We need to live in the present. We can learn and accept the local culture. We need to have a positive outlook on the future.
There are good people in every country. We can make friends with our new coworkers or neighbors. We can adjust to our new environment and see the positive in everything. Then, we will not feel homesick. We will love our new home.
December 13, 1987
No. 23 Inner Peace Means Heaven
“If we don’t have inner pain and darkness, the world would be a heaven.”
I want to talk about this quotation and how we can enlighten and feel in heaven.
As we know, we have outer and inner selves, physical and mental, and spiritual bodies. These two are not in contradiction but are complementary.
Ever since birth, we have had different emotions, needs, and talents. We need to fulfill these needs and talents; otherwise, we will feel distressed.
Unfortunately, many people do not have fulfilled lives due to a lack of knowledge about their inner selves.
Our spiritual energy is connected to our thought process. Positive thoughts are productive. They give us a purpose. It’s like knowing where we want to go. We have the directions to our destination. We go there with confidence and return with a sense of satisfaction.
The foundation of our spiritual energy is satisfaction and inner peace. Inner peace is inner heaven. It is a pleasant feeling. On the contrary, negative thoughts create negative energy and worry. It is like trying to find our destination in the dark with no directions.
We cannot get to where we want, and we feel dissatisfied. Dissatisfaction with life drains our energy. That’s when we feel as if we live in hell. Living in hell is painful and difficult.
The answer to living in heaven instead of hell is self-awareness and self-help. By knowing our inner world, we can create the heaven. We can do it knowing ourselves with our culture and its values.
December 20, 1987
No. 24 Jealousy
We have several feelings, emotions, and talents that we do not use because we are not aware of their existence. If we don’t tap into these feelings and get them stimulated, we will not know that they exist. The most famous feeling is jealousy. We have a famous saying in Farsi, “A jealous person never can rest.” *
Jealousy exists in both Positive and Negative Channels. Envy is a positive feeling that can motivate us, but jealousy is a negative feeling and can be destructive. If we recognize this feeling, then we can control it. Many people use the word “jealousy” in their daily conversations. They tell their kids, “Don’t be jealous,” or, “Why are you so jealous?” etc.
We use the word based on past habits. It is a learned behavior. We talk about jealousy but without being in control. Jealousy drains our energy. It creates dissatisfaction with life. Our different emotions are connected and intertwined like a chain. We need to be aware of each emotion's function. In order to control jealousy, we need to appreciate the little stuff in our lives. Appreciate all the blessings that we take for granted. When a friend or relative shows jealousy and talks about other people’s luck, we can remind them of their own blessings. God is just, and we all have different gifts. We can tell them, “It will not be fair if you got all the good things in life and the bad ones are for others.” During these kinds of conversations, we practice how controlling our own jealousy.
We can change jealousy to envy and use it as motivation to progress. We need patience and consideration of our abilities. Then, we can accomplish our goals successfully.
December 27, 1987
* Of course, it rhymes nicely in Farsi
No. 25 Self-Confidence
Self-confidence means trusting our abilities. It is a healthy and productive feeling. Self-confidence is self-reliance and leads to inner peace.
There are many things in life that we want to learn, but we can only do it some. We need to focus on what is essential and improve the knowledge we already have. We can progress financially and emotionally by expanding our knowledge of life skills.
First, we can ask, “What is life?” The second question can be, “What do I want from life?” The answer to the first question is that life is a beautiful journey. It is a path with several turns. We are born on a beautiful day, and we die, leaving behind good and bad memories. This is the natural system, and we cannot change it. We need to accept it.
For the second question, we need to enjoy the journey. We need to have self-awareness to enjoy our blessings and have fulfilling lives. We can transfer this inner peace to our children.
Life is easier than we think. Especially in this century, we have many comforts and possibilities. If we have clear goals, then we can reach them. We need to be careful not to repeat our ancestors’ mistakes. There is no need to be motivated by greed. Every job has its own value.
Even if we are laborers, we need to do it with joy. We can improve our skills and be an expert in our field. By satisfying our inner talents, we can benefit financially and emotionally.
Happiness is not in being a doctor, lawyer, or engineer. Happiness is in self-awareness and tapping into our inner and unknown talents. Fulfilling these desires would give us emotional energy.
I hope we can all see the world with our inner eye. By self-awareness, we become confident and happy persons.
January 3, 1988
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